Friday 23 October 2009

Pammy's platinum pool problems

After death and divorce, moving house is the third most stressful life event. And no-one knows this better than home movie enthusiast and celebrity hepatitis sufferer Pamela Anderson.

Having spent her entire adult life transforming herself into a living Barbie doll, she's now on the home strait and has been busy building her very own dream beach-house in Malibu. Except that it's not exactly going to plan.

She originally bought the property for £850,000, but has since poured millions into it, ultimately running $3 million over budget. Maybe on reflection, tiling the entire swimming pool in platinum was an unnecessary indulgence.

It seems that Pammy's assets may be considerable, but they're not limitless. So with money running out and the pressure building, the silicon stunner has had to go to extreme measures to keep her head (and other bits) above water.

She recently revealed that she's had to move into a trailer park with her boyfriend Jamie Padgett and sons Brandon and Dylan. Although, with two kids, a new boyfriend, a pick-up truck full of g-strings and hair so straw-like she could wear it in bales, she shouldn't have too much trouble fitting in.

But as well as finding an appropriately familiar living space, she's also managed to pick a nice little earner that's not a million miles from what she knows best. The industrious icon has signed up to appear as the Genie in Aladdin at the New Wimbledon Theatre.

Since her role was announced, ticket sales have rocketed by 800%, presumably thanks to dads across south London suddenly expressing an interest in the cultural heritage of pantomime.

It might initially seem like a rather left-field choice for the life-saving lovely, but actually, it makes a lot of sense. Think about it - tight costumes, duff dialogue, preposterous scenarious, heaps of innuendo and plenty of audience interaction. If that doesn't sound like Baywatch, I don't know what does.

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